When people hear my weight loss story and learn that I lost 140 pounds, they immediately start asking me questions. Most of them want to know how to lose weight fast. To answer this question once and for all, this post will reveal my top fast weight loss tips.
Top 14 Tips To Lose Weight Fast
Tip #14: Only Eat Organic Foods
No, it’s not because organic foods are healthier, but because they are more expensive. That’s why I recommended they change the name of “Whole Foods” to “Whole Paycheck”. Organic foods are so expensive you cannot afford to buy much food. If you buy less food, you will eat less food and you will lose weight fast.
Tip #13: Become a Vegetarian
You have seen plenty of overweight vegetarians, but those are not real vegetarians. They eat french fries, pasta, sugar, and loaves of white bread. To lose weight fast, you must become a Raw Vegetarian. Raw Vegetarians only eat uncooked vegetables. No grains, sugars, fruits, roots, beans, nuts, dairy, or animal products.
Tip #12: Go Low Carb and Low Fat
Some weight loss experts tell you to eat “low carb”. Others say “low fat”. I think they are both right. You will lose weight fast if you only eat lean proteins. Egg-whites for breakfast. Tuna for lunch. Chicken breasts for dinner. Lean lunch meat for snacks.
Tip #11: Try Jenny Keg
Tip #10: Try Slim Quik
You have heard of Slim Fast Shakes and the Slim Fast Plan. Well, the Slim Quik Plan is better. You eat a Snickers for breakfast, a Snickers for lunch, and a Lean Cuisine for dinner. That’s fewer than 1000 calories a day. I like Snickers, but you can use other candy bars also.
Tip #9: Wear a Weight Vest
Dr Oz suggests people wear a pedometer all day to burn more calories. I never understood that because pedometers aren’t that heavy. Instead, I suggest you walk around wearing a 50-pound Weighted Vest. Now, that will burn some serious calories.
Tip #8: Quit Your Job
Having a job is overrated. It is also bad for your waistline. If you quit your job, you will really start to lose weight fast. You will have less money to buy food. You will also have more time to sleep. The more you sleep, the faster the pounds will drop off.
Tip #7: Try the Broth Diet
I designed another weight loss plan called “The Broth Diet”. With The Broth Diet, you can consume as much broth as you want. The broth can be any flavor. I personally enjoy beef or chicken. The only rule is that you must eat it with a fork.
Tip #6: Only Eat On T and S Days
Some people want to lose weight fast without changing the foods they eat. No problem. With the T & S Plan, you don’t have to change what you eat. But, you can only eat on the days of the week that start with a T or an S. Imagine how much weigh you’ll lose if you stop eating on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.
Tip #5: Wire Your Jaw Shut
This is an oldie, but still a goodie. Having your jaw wired shut by a dentist is a great way to lose weight quickly. It’s cheaper and less invasive than gastric bypass. You will be unable to eat, so you will be forced to lose weight. You will also be unable to talk, so people may actually start enjoying your company.
Tip #4: Try the Big Mac Diet
Any one who knows me, knows that I love Big Macs. I love the sauce, the buns, and the little onions. They are my favorite junk food. I have enjoyed Big Macs in four countries and Puerto Rico. I eat one every month as one of my cheat meals. But, it does not have to be a cheat anymore. With “The Big Mac Diet”, you have half of a Big Mac for breakfast, half of a Big Mac for lunch, and a whole Big Mac for dinner. That is fewer than 1100 calories a day. You will lose weight fast and enjoy every minute of it.
Tip #3: Go To Cancun
Simply go to Cancun and eat what you want. But, don’t forget to drink Mexican tap water with your meals. Eventually, you will experience Montezuma’s revenge. Your body will eliminate the calories you just ate and you will be much too sick to eat anymore. Spring Break Weight Loss Plan!
Tip #2: Try P30XXX
If you stay up late at night watching infomercials then you know what P90X is. If not, P90X is the extreme home fitness system that helps you lose weight, get ripped, and look like a fitness model at home. However, it is a 90 day plan. You don’t want to wait 90 days. You want to lose weight fast. With P90X, you do a workout everyday for 90 days. Forget that. With my P30XXX, you use the P90X system; but instead of 1 workout daily, you do 3 workouts everyday. This will help you see results in only 30 days.
Tip #1: Use Naked Pictures
The fastest weight loss plan I have created is “The Naked Picture Diet”. With The Naked Picture Diet, you can eat anything you want and as much as you want. The only rule is that you have to eat while looking at two naked pictures of yourself. Get your camera. The first naked picture should be full frontal and the second should be a full side shot. If you are eating with friends or family, share the pictures. It will help them lose weight also.
Bonus Tip: Don’t Lose Weight Fast
The fast weight loss tips above were not meant to be taken seriously. They can help you lose weight quickly, but the weight is unlikely to stay off.
Small permanent lifestyle changes lead to slow permanent weight loss. Large temporary lifestyle changes lead to fast temporary weight loss. You choose. – Kalvin Chinyere, M.D.
Get a copy of Dr. Kal’s free weight loss plan the Don’t Go Broke Diet. The Don’t Go Broke Diet is your guide to inexpensive and permanent weight loss. The new you is waiting. Get started now!
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